Cowshed

If you don’t like being told what to do, then Cowshed is probably not for you. The self-described beefhouse (as opposed to steakhouse) offers four types of steak, each served how they want to serve it, not how you ask them to serve it – “trust us”, they implore on the menu.

There’s flat iron, rump, ribeye and fillet, each 8oz and each accompanied by the serving suggestion and a useful description of the cut. If you can’t decide which to go for, there’s the “Greedy Cow(s)” option; the bracket “s” presumably meaning you could eat it all yourself, which might necessitate the use of a defibrillator, or at least a Rennie or two. It includes the flat iron, rump and ribeye all on one platter, plus two sides and two sauces.

All the steaks are chargrilled and served with a zingy rocket salad sprinkled with thickly grated Parmesan; you can order bone marrow for a little bit more. On top of that, you add your sauce – there’s pepper, blue cheese and Béarnaise, as you might expect, plus garlic and herb cream and bourbon BBQ.

Handily, they let you know which are vegan and vegetarian, but then again there is a chargrilled cauliflower alternative to the steak, if you’re so tight as to drag your vegan mate to a steak gaff with you.

Sides include no-nonsense fries, sweet potato mash, truffled garlic mushrooms and a savoy cabbage number, plus waffles and eggs.

Dessert, and again there’s a limited choice. A cheesecake of the day requires input from your server, while brownies need no explanation and a ginger and clementine panna cotta has our attention.